I felt joy that I was finished with High School. Happy that there were no more examinations. Not having to deal with them teachers who a good number of them did not even believe in you. Extreme joy that I did not have to wear them Blue Rags (Blue AGHS uniform dress) again.
But then it was mixed with sadness. Some of my friends were preparing to migrate to study. Some migrated to live. Some started working and I rarely saw them. Sad that I didn't have any male friends that I would have been able to bring along to the ball. Sad that my friends were either in their groups enjoying their last night as Antigua Girls' High School students or with their dates.
I remember I would see the girls looking gorgeous and taking pictures of each other and having people take group pictures of them and close friends. I had then gotten overwhelmed with the feeling of being ALONE.
Even though I went to the ball with my best friend in high school I still felt soo alone. I even walked the halls of the building which allowed us to hold our Grand Affair there. One of my friends saw me wandering and asked if I was OK and I lied and in my heart I just felt alone.
That feeling I have felt so many times afterwards. Feeling alone while being out with friends, feeling alone when in a group of people, even feeling alone when alone with another person.
I don't want to feel alone. But they say you are born alone and will die alone. However when I am in a group why must I feel like this?
I hope that feeling goes away soon. Because it is not fun.
I know there are alot of people who are feeling all alone. So I guess we can say we are Alone Together.
OXXO
Mayeshah!!!
