Friday, May 22, 2020

800 posts! What's next?

So I was going through some of my past posts and noticed one that said 300th post. As I continued I saw the 550th post. I was then wondering how and what did I share with you guys and dolls for me to reach 550.

I then got curious to how many I had actually posted for the world to read (thank goodness it is just a few of you). I counted up what I have published and I reached 798 posts, which was just before I posted about Frida Kahlo. 

I now reached my 800th post between 2006 and 2020. Lots of thoughts out here into the ethos of the world wide web. Random Ish.

Now I wanted to also put a lil extra stuff out there. I have been told, don't share too much personal things about myself on the internet. But if I can share it and maybe, just maybe, have an effect on someone while people have access to the internet, that is worth everything I own and more.

Just before I turned 30, I decided to do a lil Instagram journey. 24 days of Self Love and Acceptance. I had been told that I was so brave to do that and how they appreciated me sharing my journey. But now 2 years later I noticed that I shouldn't try and force myself to love but Indeed learn to accept. Accept what is given for it  can easily be taken away. However, there is no issue with not loving what you have. 

A new friend of mine, who has been a great listener to me, asked me during one of our conversations "why do I hate yourself?" And my answer was "Alot of thing." So going forward in the next few posts I will be sharing my Instagram journey from 2017 along with the actual things I hate about myself. 

I don't do this for content, I don't do this for you as a reader, I don't do this for attention. I do this for me, to get them out my head so that I can deal with them one by one. Maybe someone will read it and see that we are alike, or (more than likely) someone will read it and judge me. Such is life.

OXXO

Mayeshah

Thursday, May 21, 2020

Frida Kahlo

That moment when you realize some of the things you do not have in life, and envy others for.

I just watched the movie Frida and not only do I envy her but I can see where her pain comes from in her paintings. Yes, I know movies are very likely to be glorified versions of the true person. Having some parts slightly altered, omitted, or greatly changed all together for film. However, the first thing that I noticed about Ms Frida Kahlo is her unibrow. 
In my mind she is stunning and (although the word exotic comes to mind, I will use) confident. Seeing her, especially with her unibrow which is ridiculed in today's society, proved that she accepted herself for who she is. This is something that is rare. 

Now onto the movie which stars Salma Hayek as Frida. A few things stood out to me that I wanted to touch on, some of which is cultural and some of it is the individual herself. Passion for life, passion for love, looks of intimacy, a sense of sensuality, and discussions.

During the entire movie, there are moments of passion for life. The singing the laughter, the comradery amongst people. Although they were going through their political instability people still went out there and drank, sang and was merry. I see that in certain settings around me such as Guyanese, Italian, and Mexican groups. I envy them. For it feels like they are living life and not just existing. 

In the beginning of the movie you see Frida and her friend (maybe boyfriend) having sex and although you know that it is just a physical act, their interactions while together shows love between them. You also see that love portrayed with her husband, Diego. They don't hold back, their love is evident. Their love is passionate. Their love is pure. The passion for love being shown is something I never seen in person. In movies, yes; but to be able to feel the love between two people, no. To know that they love the good and the bad about each other. No.

Diego's second wife made a statement to Frida that women are like clay in his hands because of how he looks at them. That look of desire, that look of intimacy. Not lust, but actual intimacy where there is a connection between the 2 persons. Like they are the most beautiful creature ever created. This makes all women melt inside when done right. And few men actually know how to do this.

The sense on sensuality. It is never about the act of sex but the act of sensuality which makes sex so fun. Obviously it starts out with the look of intimacy and desire, then progresses into light touches and kisses, which then profress to passionate kisses and then the act. It is what gets the blood boiling, the heart racing, the juices running. Sensuality has slowly died away. Now it is about a quick fuck to get off or to hold you over until the next fuck. Where is the light kissing, the caressing, the teasing? Long gone as we are now in a society where we don't have enough time for anything. 

Then to end it all, there is Discussions. Sapiosexuals are people who are sexually attracted to intelligence. I find there is a large number of women who are sapiosexuals but settle for what they can get. The ability to have discussions and share thoughts, feelings, intellect, goals, dreams, likes and dislikes. Now that is sexy. Pair that with sensuality, and a man can conquer the world around him.

I adored watching this movie. It has opened my eyes to much more than I thought. Although she struggled with her physical ailments due to that ill fated collision, she lived a life that few would be able to say they ever could.

OXXO

Mayeshah!!!

Tuesday, May 19, 2020

Movie Scores

There is that moment where you noticed that alot of the movies in the past used movie scores to tug that heart string that they didn't get hold of with the story line and acting. 

I just watched Meet Joe Black with Anthony Hopkins and Brad Pitt. 
Near the end of the movie I am all invested in the moment where they are looking into each other's eyes. No words are being said. The all the emotion is being portrayed. I then got side tracked with something, and when I continued watching I noticed the background musical score increasing in tempo, pulling me back into the emotion and romance of the moment.

I never noticed how much that musical score played up on your emotions. Then I thought back to alot of the movies around that time and they all had the same instances. 

I guess it would be weird if the two characters were just looking at each other and you can hear the background chatter or the extras. But I think some movies would incorporate the musical score as a band or a radio playing music in the background. But you know that in movies like Meet Joe Black the score was specifically selected to draw you into the moment. Make you feel all the feels. Make you want to be looked at that way. Make you hold your breath waiting for the kiss.
Waiting to be loved just like that. 

That moment in time I noticed that element of the movie is almost more important than the actual movie itself. 

OXXO
Mayeshah!!!


Moments of truth

When I was a freshman in University, I took a class called Hospitality 101. (Yes, I studied hospitality, actually hotel management). One thing I specifically remembered about this class was learning about Moments of Truth. 

In the hospitality industry you have many opportunities (moments) of changing a guest's experience from a bad one into a good one, and vice versa. As the worker, it is easier to maintain positive guest experiences but you can only swear by your own actions and not that of other people. So you should also be skilled to turn that frown upside down. Return that guest from a negative state of being into a positive.  

Most people I interact with are there for a week to 2 weeks. So you have hundreds of opportunities per day to change the experience.

This also happens in life. You have hundreds of opportunities per day to change your experience. Hundreds of moments of truth each day for the rest of your life. Once your heart beats, there are opportunities. Moments in life is what makes everything worth it.

Let's proceed on a journey of MOMENTS OF TRUTH.

OXXO 

Mayeshah.