Can I do that? No, I can't!!

So my sister and I were talking and we were talking about the situation that the lack of a car is making things quite difficult for us. There is also a situation with the person who was supposed to fix the said car and he is not proving himself worthy.

My sister then stated that she read somewhere that Aquarians dont like people saying they can do something and in the end they prove that they cannot. If they are unable to do something just say that they can't. Instantly my mind started racing because .... I am one of those people.



I am ashamed of it but I have bean told always try. I have also been delegated tasks that I know that I cant do but just to take the weight off of other people I have not turned it down. I am presently in that situation and I know I should just address the people and apologize but I am so nervous of the reaction. I know I will have to face them eventually but I am not ready yet.



So I am the type of person that my sister does not like. But I know I was not like this at birth and was conditioned to be this way from something. How am I gonna handle this?? I noticed after this move there are lots of things about me that my sister does not like in people but I try to change just to make life easier. OK when I say lots I mean a few that my brain does not want to conjure up because it is weird like that.

I know they say people should accept you for who you are but when you don't know who you are you have a tendency to try and be what other people want you to be. That is one of the reasons why I chose to work in the industry I am in but now I realize that I need to be a solid well found person.So now I am even more lost.

If there was only a reset button.

Well there isn't so oh well.

OXXO

Mayeshah!!!

Dirty Deeds (2005) full movie

Alright so this is the second movie for the ... morning? day? yea you know what I mean. I tend to suffer from Insomnia when I dont feel I get the chance to do what I wanna do.



So I am a sucker for American High School Movies. This was just a great icing on top of the cake kinda movie. It reminded me of Slum Dog Millionaire where just the randomist things happen at the right time.



Because I am bias and it is my blog and me watching movies I will give this movie a 9/10. It would have been a full 10/10 if there werent so much scenes where I was worried and had to look away.





OXXO



Mayeshah!!!

The Figure

So I do not see myself as a poet but something came to me a few days ago and I didnt want to let it pass me by.

As morning sounds of birds rise me from deep slumber
I look to my side and see a figure which is not common to my everyday scenery
As recognition flickers into my foggy awareness
I smile remembering last night
Watching the motion of this figure mesmerizes me 
For a minute feel like I am in a dream
Feeling the rise and fall of its chest like the ocean
Then its eyes open and sees me watching
Such a gentle creature it  is
Gentle and peaceful
Learning everything about me
Awareness is present in its eyes 
I wonder what it is thinking about
No words need to be said this morning 
All the words were said last night
It turns its back towards me 
I watch the sight of its back 
I close my eyes 
Replaying the entire evening in my mind
Getting to know each other better
I open my eyes and this figure was gone.
My dreams are becoming way to vivid now.
This figure was almost real.

I have to say I have made some alterations (no not some, ALOT) but This is what I shall settle with.

Blaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

OXXO

Mayeshah!!!

Moved out and more responsibility at work.

I have finally moved out of my childhood home and I am loving it!!!!



Not that I didn't enjoy the perks of living in the family home and all, the free food, free transport, free internet, free laundry/cleaning services. I just needed the free-dom. That is one thing I felt was lacking. So now that I have moved in with my big sis everything is at peace.

Well it was until our transport decided to go on the fritz this long holiday weekend. WHHHHYYY!!!!!?????



So now we have to wait on my father to pick us up and drop us where ever!!!

If I knew this was liable to happen I would have invested in a "CAR MAN". You know the kind of man that all teenage girls want. I heard almost all the girls in my high school raving about this "Car Man" not understanding the big deal about it. But now that I want to go places and have my freedom I can't; and I don't even have a "Car Man".

But such is life. In time I will own my own vehicle and not depend on anyone for all this shit.


I have also been quite busy at work. I am now working as a Human Resources Assistant/ Payroll Clerk. When I tell them that they say, "you making all the money now".


But hopefully soon.

Well I will soon have pics of my place and will share it with the world. MUHAHAHAH and then start planning my house warming party which will come with some more pictures :D

Well I gonna finish chilling online and then head on home since tomorrow will be an internet free zone. Maybe I should top up my phone some more. hmmm.

Oh well.

OXXO

Mayeshah!!!