Hour in the City

Dear Readers,

I found out today something about myself, some people might not like it but it is the honest to God truth. I am PATHETIC. I almost wanted to cry today because of what I did. Maybe because of the day I decided to do it. Maybe because it is the beginning of the Easter Vacation. But I felt so retarded and just wanted to sink into the ground.

You probably wondering if i fell on my face in the middle of the road or something embarrassing like that. But no, It is worst, I almost had an anxiety attack even. I went into the City Centre of Leeds, ... by myself. I am thinking to myself, yes I can do this, I was born alone so I can be alone and walk around the City Centre by myself. OMG What a stupid mothersucking idea. I had an aim when i went so that is the main reason I even bothered to go.

Lets start from the beginning, I went out and was like "if the bus is going to take more than 15 mins to come then I will walk". So I looked at the schedule and the bus was coming in 5 mins. So I waited and I caught the bus. I should have noticed something when the bottom decker was full. So I went upstairs and saw 2 seats empty. So I sat near the window. Then when we were coming up to one of the many bus stops I noticed 3 Muslim ladies jogging (not running or walking) to the bus stop. So they reached on the bus and came upstairs and one of them decided to sit next to me. I didnt mind because I would sometimes sit next to people when the bus fullish. But the thing that urked me was that her arm was touching my arm and her thigh was touching my thigh. That did not need to happen.

Moving along.. so I got off the bus and was sooooo disoriented. I never took the bus all the way down there, and I never walked there. So I didnt know where I was. So I walked a bit looking for landmarks that would help me know where I was. Then I saw the theatre and found my way to the Leeds City Market (an indoor market) and walked the aisles feeling like a freak of nature.then I found what I was looking for A BAG. Not just any bag but one of them bags that can go around your body and land on ur hip. So I was in there like 15-20 mins before finding a store that sold the ones I was looking for. So I bought 1 and put all my junk in there. Then started to walk, planning to just take in the stores and the landscape and everything. But as soon as I got out of the Market I was bombarded with people. SO... It is a Saturday, and the Saturday before a 2 week Easter Break for most students (if not all). So I am looking around and all I see is groups of people, ranging from the 2 people walking togethr talking to the groups of 6-7 people all just taking the piss (no not pissing on the street, but just acting the fool). So I walked over by one of the malls, Victoria Quarter, with all the name brand stores, thinking to myself in there might be less densely populated. BOY WAS I WRONG. I made my way out the other entrance and decided to just catch the bus back to my dorm.

I felt so retarded. I was all alone, didnt know where I was going, and everyone and their momma, sista, brotha and cant forget granparents were there. I was told to get out of my room and just go and have fun outside. My response to that is if one of you people reading comes to keep me company I will go out and have fun. To make matters worst I bought some manderine lookin shit in the market and they SOUR A BITCH!!! but i am sick so i will continue eating them.

In conclusion, I am never going out to the city by myself unless it is going to class or to do a one time errand.

OXXO

Mayeshah